How many spice names do you recall? Forget the names; do you remember the flavors, or are they all just categorized in a few – Sweet, Salty, Spicy/Chilly, Sour?
This is how I’ve constructed my life – many words, but few modest successes. I’m not really any different from you. I sleep, walk, talk, eat, just like you. However, I am different in the sense that I’m not a good person. And it’s not just one person who has told me this, but many who know me, be it a little or more, have reached the conclusion and labeled me as the cause of their failures. I’ve always made them feel bad about themselves and pushed them into a zone from which there is no return. This is where my power lies.
If you wish to feel lost, frustrated, without hope, as if life has abandoned you, then you need to keep me close. Your wish will be granted so seamlessly that you won’t even realize how you’ve been pushed into a place where darkness prevails, where hope is nonexistent, and all that remains is tears and curses.
Sometimes, I curse myself for simply existing because every breath I take seems to propel someone into eternal darkness. It’s a darkness so unsettling that it lets you live, but you’ll feel breathless, with no air, no energy, and no life. Your heart will race uncontrollably, like a fish in water that appears like water but is nothing more than a form of punishment. The fish can’t reach its mouth to breathe; it keeps its mouth open, but there’s no water for it to swim in. It’s just a matter of counting breaths and witnessing the impending suffering, which is not too distant.
I am the accursed one who touches and turns everything from white to deep black, bestowing upon you a cloud of darkness.
I’m like a spice box that lures you with flavors, colors, and tempting aromas, but once you’ve sampled, it takes away everything you have. I am both, look blessed but cursed, and I shall pass on this black essence, this touch that will leave you unhealed for the rest of your life, lost in perpetual confusion.
The World I See! 